The takes are too long, you need to cut faster, and the original always had graphic overlays on the scenes, usually close-up shots of some medical instruments, sliding slowly over the main scene, being aproximately 70% transparent.
Nice color grading though! And you should have used old scenes for the veteran cast, as in the original they also used old scenes (e.g. Dr. Greene: In season 8 still the shot from Pilot episode!)
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